A little girl pours freshly boiled yam into a mortar and grabs a pestle. She starts to pound the yam; she’ll prove to her friends who taunted that she can become a good wife and cook. She would make the toughest of meals and make it well, they in turn would like it, she vowed silently. That would shut them up for good!
She struggles with the heavy shifting mortar and oversized weighty pestle in the stuffy disorganised kitchen. Her vegetable stew is burning! She runs to stir and taste it. Ooh, the pounded yam is getting cold and will form lumps so she returns to it with achy arms and sweaty palms. Her mother comes in to help but she is rebuffed. Watching for a while, she silently steps forward and collects the pestle from her little one, who surrenders; dejected but relieved to relinquish control.
The end result is so much better than she could have imagined. It amazed her that her mum could salvage such a mess, both the food and the kitchen. She could not have made such a superb meal that the entire family commended. But then, she consoled herself, Mum’s made this so many times.
At a time or two in our lives, we have been hurt by someone, had our egos bruised, or our trust betrayed. We vowed to teach the perpetrators a lesson they would not forget in a hurry, if ever. We resolved not to let go because the offense was unpardonable, heinous, and inexcusable! We wield an oversize pestle ready to smash their lives to smithereens but wait!
Hand over your pestle to Allah, pocket your pride and swallow your anger. When you allow Him take control, you will recognise that none can win your fight better than Allah. When Allah picks the gauntlet on your behalf, you will realise that your adversaries will be in such awe at His actions that you will begin to pity them.
However, there is an even better alternative. We should let go and forgive. We should adopt patience and relinquish the control the person has over our lives. It is for our own good and will truly set us free.